If only we could stop making excuses, we can radically change our lives and do much more than we ever thought we were capable of.

Making excuses is convenient. It is easy, cheap, and we can use excuses to deflect responsibility. Excuses allow us to stay still and stop ourselves from changing to the better.

However, we can learn how to stop making excuses using my “excuses-countering method,” and begin to see the difference we want in our lives.

Three Steps to Stop Making Excuses

I have experimented over the years with different techniques to help me stop making excuses.

Some have worked and some have failed, and I am here to share with you the techniques that have worked for me in the hopes that they may help you too.

Here are my three ways to stop making excuses.

1. Recognize That You Are Making Excuses

Making excuses on a constant basis can become a habit. The longer you’ve been making excuses, the more effort you will need to break it. However, taking a first small step is sometimes all you need to begin the process of change.

And it begins be recognizing that you are making excuses.

Here’s a quick real life example:

I was speaking with a good friend of mine who was sick and tired of everything. she was tired of her job, of her lifestyle, and of her “friends.”

Every time we saw each other, she would say things like:

• “I am not happy at this job.”
• “I haven’t done anything challenging in 3 years.”
• “I can’t live the way I want on the salary they pay me.”

She had been saying this to me for over three months until one day I said to her: “well, why don’t you look for something else to do with your time.”

And that’s when she started making excuses.

She said things like:

• “BUT, I don’t have the time.”
• “BUT, what else can I do?”

Her excuses seemed automatic. They did not require much thought or deliberation. She was in the habit of making excuses on a constant basis. Do you make constant excuses?

If you have then, the first small step that you can take to stop making excuses is to recognize that you are making them. If you are reading this post and you’re looking to stop making excuses, then you’re here because you realize that you are making excuses and you need to stop making them. So congrats, you have already completed the first step.

2. Choose How To Respond to Your Excuses

The way you choose how to respond to your excuses will determine whether you will succeed at making a change or not.

For example, people say that they can never lose weight, improve their writing skills, make money, or stick to their decisions because they don’t have time. If they choose to accept this excuses, then they will stay in place and not make any progress.

While having bad genetics, or being born into a poor family are beyond your control, you nevertheless can control how you respond to those things.

You always have the choice to get up an hour earlier, to work a second job, to develop a new skill, to freelance, and so on and so forth. You always have the choice to be creative. You always have the choice to go back to school.

So for the second step in the process, choose to respond proactively.

Here’s how you can respond proactively:

If you’re making excuses about why you’re not making enough money, say to yourself, “I am not making enough money because I am only working part time, and I if I don’t change that or develop a new skill I won’t make enough money.”

If you find yourself making excuses about not having enough time, say to yourself, “I don’t have enough time because I don’t like to wake up early and if I don’t change that, I won’t have enough time.”

If you make excuses about not having enough education, say to yourself, “I don’t have enough education because I haven’t tried to contact a community college or take night classes or take online courses, and if I don’t do that I won’t become more educated.”

When you begin to counteract your excuses, you will bring realism into your life. You will finally understand that you’ve created and defended a failure narrative…

Look at yourself in the mirror and face the reality of your circumstances, you’re either going to believe your excuses or you’re going to create an empowering story of what you should do to move on and move ahead.

3. Take Massive Action

As I’ve suggested in this post, you can change only if you shift the burden of responsibility from your external world unto yourself.

So if you’re not happy at your job, ask yourself to find a solution. You can either quit your job; though that’s not advisable if you don’t have a plan of action or haven’t developed a transferrable skill set, or you can change your attitude (and try to like your job) until you can move on to something better.

That’s really all there is to it.

Whatever you do, don’t just sit at home. Take massive action and just do it. Don’t overcomplicate it or fill yourself with fear.

Here are three questions that will help you get started on taking action:

1. Given your job, what skills can you further develop on the job that can help you land a better job or start a business? Know what they are and focus on improving them.

2. How can you use whatever extra time you have on the job and outside of it to learn something that can help change?

3. When I didn’t like my job or circumstances, I reminded myself every morning that I am going to my job because I need to (1) improve skill x or y, and (2) to use whatever extra time I have to learn something useful.

Using this method, I was able to shift my perspective.

From there on, and in every job I’ve ever worked at, I always found a few minutes here and there (and sometimes a few hours) to work on my own goals. I recognized early on that if I didn’t use my time wisely, I would never make it. And so I made sure to use whatever time I had to write and learn more about writing.

One tool that could totally help you write effortlessly is Grammarly –disclosure: I will receive a commission if you use my links. Grammarly is a wonderful writing assistant that helps you compose bold, clear, and concise sentences. It checks the styling and structure of your writing to help you produce great material. I recommend them.

If I am sitting at my desk and find that I have a few extra minutes, I would find an article and read it.

If I am not sitting at my desk, I would pull out my phone and read. I read a lot about psychology and marketing and I knew that writing, psychology and marketing are necessary skills for survival in today’s economy.

But if you choose to explain why you’re not where you should be because you don’t have time or the skill or the eduction or the resources, or even the social and professional networks, then you will create believable excuses that will only keep you where you already are.

However, if you decide to recognize that successful people don’t have any more time than you do and that they don’t have any less commitments than you do and you understand that things won’t change unless you counter your excuses and change your attitude, only then can you begin to make progress.