In the past few years, studies have shown that being “agreeable” in the workplace is negatively linked to success. The disagreeable personality, on the other hand, has a much greater chance of succeeding.

Agreeableness is a personality trait that indicates how likely you are to conform to social expectations and promote good feeling within your group. The more agreeable you are, the more likely it is for you to make “acceptable” decisions — in order not to upset anyone and be disliked.

In his book; David and Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants, Malcolm Gladwell reiterates this important idea.

Gladwell finds that agreeable people are too scared to break the rules. Breaking the rules or disrupting the social norms creates conflict, and agreeable people try to avoid that because they value an atmosphere of camaraderie and acceptance.

The main downside of this personality trait is that it never challenges the status quo. It never challenges traditional ideas or old concepts — and consequently it rarely promotes innovation.

Wondering how you can improve your writing so you can write more with less effort? Check out Grammarly — disclosure: I will receive a commission (at no cost to you) if you make a purchase because you are using my referral link. Grammarly is a writing assistant that can help you make progress writing a blog or a draft of a novel, book or a thesis. I recommend Grammarly to all my family members and friends.

On the other hand, innovation is born as a result of disagreeing with the given norms. In fact, the world’s most famous and successful entrepreneurs like Thomas Edison, Steve Jobs and other highly successful leaders had a disagreeable personality.

They didn’t care about what their peers thought of them and they didn’t seek the approval of those they worked with. They were strong-headed, assertive and contrarian. They had an unwavering belief in the potential of their ideas and they wanted to see it realized. Simply put, they weren’t afraid to be disruptive.

I was the first person out of my friends and family members to start a blog. They first did not think it was such a good idea, but after they see the value this blog offers, they became some of my most loyal fans. You too can start a blog and share value with others. Here’s how to start a personal blog & dress it up with a beautiful theme (with pictures).

1. The Disagreeable Attitude

When we speak of a disagreeable personality, the first image that comes to mind is that of an aggressive person. And you may think that in order to become more creative and more innovative in your work or your life you have to become a jerk.

That’s simply not true.

Let me explain.

Being disagreeable is an important trait only insofar as it helps you promote your vision. And the degree of disagreeableness that you may need to exhibit will depend on the group of people you work with. For instance, some people are naturally flexible and they will respect your ideas and gladly give them a try with little resistance. Here, there’s really no need to be particularly contrarian when you promote your ideas.

Others, however, will openly shoot down your ideas and move on to what they believe is a better approach. In such instances, you need to be more assertive and speak with confidence and conviction to get the attention you deserve. Sometimes it doesn’t work to be disagreeable in a soft way. You have to level up your attitude and make yourself heard.

But, again, there is no one approach that fits all situation, so – from my experience, I had to experiment to see what suited me best. But one thing I found is that having solid confidence is key. See my post on how to build self-confidence using acting/drama exercises.

2. You Are Where You Deserve to Be

Before you can begin to develop a disagreeable personality, you need to have a clear vision of where you want to be along with a solid work ethic routine. If you lack any of these two elements, you really don’t have much of a need to be disagreeable. You really have nothing to be disagreeable about.

How many hours do you work a day? And by that I mean, how many hours a day are you doing productive work and not merely sitting behind your desk? Are you serious enough to log your hours or is that just not for you? Do you know exactly how much time you’re spending pursuing your dreams? Could you be spending more time working on your ideas? If not, then you don’t need to be disagreeable. Why would you?

Now, if you do have an idea and you want to explore if it will bear fruit, you need to become radically obsessed with it and treat it as an extension of yourself. And if you treat it as such, you will automatically do whatever you have to do to see it realized. Then, you will become disagreeable.

You will say NO to people that say NO to your ideas. Don’t be afraid to upset people. Don’t be afraid of not being “accepted.” Most people don’t care about your ideas and some are waiting for you to fail. It’s just dirt on your shoulder. You need to keep moving.

If you’re not obsessed with your ideas and you wonder why it’s not working out for you, then you probably need to hear this: you are in life where you deserve to be. You deserve what you have because that’s what you’ve chosen to work for. You won’t get anything more or anything less than what you deserve in life. And what you deserve is up to you to decide and to work towards.

3. Disagreeable People Know How to Re-frame

Being disagreeable isn’t just about standing up for your ideas. It’s also about persuading others to get on board with you.

If people say NO to your ideas and you manage to alienate them, then you’re really doing yourself a disservice. What are you going to do if or when you need them at some point in the future?

You need to re-frame.

Being able to re-frame the problem is crucial to persuading others. And the key to using re-framing properly is to introduce new information. You can’t convince someone of your ideas by simply repeating or re-arranging the same old information. People do that often and it almost never works.

Don’t believe me? Ask your partner how he/she feels when you repeat the same exact thing in a different way…

You need to bring in a new information that clarifies the problem and/or brings in a new benefit. Focusing on benefits seems to be a good approach, and I think it can be effective if done properly. But a more effective approach is the ability to express the problem in a clear, crisp and nuanced way. The more nuanced information you can give others about the problem you’re trying to solve, the more likely they will believe in the effectiveness of your approach.

Give it a try and see how they respond to you.